MANHATTAN SOCIETY REPORT

The Society Show & the Straw that Stirs the Drink

Welcome back, my friends
to the show that never ends.
We're so glad you could attend!
Come inside! Come inside!

There behind a glass
stands a real blade of grass
be careful as you pass.
Move along! Move along!

Come inside, the show's about to start
guaranteed to blow your head apart
Rest assured you'll get your money's worth
The greatest show in Heaven, Hell, or Earth
(Chorus)
You've got to see the show, it's a dynamo....
Emerson Lake & Palmer from Karn Evil 9: First Impression, Part Two

The Society Show, much like Ringling Bros. Barnum & Bailey Circus, has a unique cast of chracters all its own. Whether your view is that of an insider or from the outside looking in a circus may certainly seem to be the appropriate analogy. The Players?   Socialites, Publicists, Philanthropy, Fashion, Cocktails, Photographers and Press galore, all interwoven in a mix that writer Michael Gross  previously referred to as Social Life in a Blender. (Photo: R Couri Hay at a Holiday Musicale at the home of Janna Bullock on the Upper East Side of Manhattan by Gregory Partanio for Manhattan Society.com)

In modern day New York we still find remnants of the old guard, a veritable self-appointed society mafia who consider themselves part of the existing social order. Behind the scenes they serve as gatekeepers in an attempt to insure some antiquated notions of preserving the public trust that went out with Edith Wharton's, the Age of Innocence. And some think that this is rather unfortunate. Preservation of exclusivity, style and a regal element is certainly in the best interests of "the Show" but I am not sure whether all aspects are necessary or helpful. Afterall, excluding those with large checkbooks, however, is philanthropically shortsighted, if not foolish.

The similarities between "Made Men" in the Mafia and "Socialites" as accepted within the existing social hierarchy is uncanny. Case in point, Lorraine Bracco, none other than Dr. Melfi from the Soprano's is one of the more active (in a meaningful way philanthropically) ladies on Manhattan's social circuit these days. Daughter Stella Keitel, from her "relationship" with Harvey Keitel (one of this writer's favorite actors along with Pacino & DeNiro) appears to be following suit. The making of a "Socialite" is either an evolutionary process or by birth right. When a Socialite gets "whacked", however, she may just find herself banished to Page 6 infamy where ironically she can perhaps become more infamous and notorious many of those attempting to preserve the existing social order. Maybe she can ever cross over in to "Celebutante" status, see Paris Hilton.  Once a celebrity or a celebutante maybe she will even be welcomed back into the fold, even if the Co-op Board of the Luxury 5th Avenue apartment buildings banish her to East of Park or worse yet midtown.

"The List" is undoubtedly in flux but evolving as a result of a variety of factors. For one, there is commericalism and a proliferation of local print and online media domestically and internationally, covering the phenomenon of "Society", each with their own take on it and a reality TV based culture looking for more "celebs" of the moment. As a result, you will find reality TV stars making grand entrances or glorified appearances around the city at charity and cultural events posing as actual celebs, often with their own publicists in tow. "Oops, sorry I did not see you on the Apprentice. I just noticed that you had err uh uh "nice cupcakes". So since you were fired by the Donald, what else have you been up to?" Oh it wasn't Donald? Oh yeah I forgot Martha Stewart had a show also."

Secondly, there is also the never ending infusion of international monied classes into Manhattan from around the world which has further led to an expansion of what is considered "the List".  For that reason alone, it appears "the List"  largely depends on who's making it and how much actual fundraising one would like to accomplish. That perhaps explains why David Patrick Columbia's list differs from that of Jason Binn or Amy Sacco's at Bungalow 8 or for that matter Suzanne Bartsch at Happy Valley. If nothing else, it proves that no matter how cool you are, not everyone will ever think that you are cool enough to be on their list. The fact is that on any given night almost anyone can be summarily turned away out of the blue and made well to feel sort of like a Gatecrasher or a "Shaggy" (a.k.a., a shaggy haired party crasher extraordinaire with a hair line resembling a french poodle and notoriously questionable hygiene who has become infamous for his ability to sniff out an open bar on any given night in Manhattan).  Believe me I know. There is many a list that I am not on and it does not bother me, as much as it amuses me. If I have learned anything in life it is that doors open when you least expect them to and also when you are not preoccupied with having them open. I am simply more curious that there so many actual doors to open.

Society even has its own Hired Papparazzi, which are referred to as "celebrity" photographers. A designation which I informally received myself despite the fact that I photograph exclusively the world of philanthropy: socialites, business leaders, politicos, philanthropists and much less actual hollywood celebrities.  With this style of photography permission is implicit.  Jumping out of bushes is not necessary nor is a zoom lens to capture them from 1,000 feet. That would be impersonal, impolite and inefficient but also rather unnecessary.  Par for the course is full length close ups from close range to capture fully the magnificient coture designs that often these ladies are paid or asked to wear to important events.  Sure its about being seen but being seen in Vera Wang, Douglas Hannant, Ralph Lauren, Lily Pulitzer etc etc. In New York, it is certainly about who you know, who you are and what you do or have done but, it is also very much about who's designs you wear. In many cases, what you find the upwardly social wearing may very well exceed the net worth of some small countries, much less those photographing them.

If I had 15 Minutes while I was Out & About to take a stroll down the Avenue to peruse the beautiful Young on the Guest List at this week's hottest event, in a Quest to figure out how A, let's call him Andrew,  knows B, lets call him Ben (a blonde bomber who is often gawked at and is anything but a "Gatecrasher" and usually always on the List), is also connected to C, I probably would not need to ask Richard Johnson for the Lowdown or check Page 6 to confirm that the straw that stirs the drink behind many a society cocktail is none other than C, simply meaning Couri or R Couri Hay, publicist, columnist and man about town. Flamboyant? Sure. Aggressive? Perhaps at times. But, is he effective? Most definitely.  R Couri Hay is a Social Maestro, an integral cog in the wheel of philanthropy and high end social life in New York City, often conducting the flow of publicity by cultivating relationships with the press leading them to a story before, during and after events in this town.  Much like a magician or puppeteer, even when he is not present, or you cannot trace his fingerprints to a story it is his work or that of his able bodied staff, that may often be at play.  Couri certainly seems to have his competition with the growing ranks of trust fundafarian socialite/publicist/event planners each of whom have carved out a special niche and clientele in  the world of fashion and philanthropy. Ironically enough they can often be seen mixing about in the same social shark tank eyeing their prey, networking with the over networked.  Air kisses aside it is not surprising that there is a juicy under current of cattiness, envy and pretense as well as some ruthless competition, except I am not a gossip so that is as far as I will go with this. Then again, sometimes you find them working in concert at or behind the scenes for the same organization, never really sure how or who is being compensated for what is transpiring.

This may seem like a critique of the social system in place in New York, Palm Beach and the Hamptons. I can only truly speak for New York City, in particular the Island of Manhattan. To the contrary, "the Show" is a necessity for fashion, philanthropy, arts and social life to thrive and flourish in this town. Without "the Show" New York would really not be New York. If you think a drink is a drink and that clothes are merely cloth to cover your weary limbs perhaps you do not understand or comprehend what is at play here.  Hollywood has celebrity. New York has Society. No doubt, a merger of the two seems to be evolving to some degree, but not entirely, as more and more Hollywood celebrity types become omniprescent on the New York social scene mixing among the cities socialities, philanthropists and business leaders. Perhaps this is a wise move for those in the entertainment business who find themselves between sitcoms, film roles or on the downward side of a career cycle in an attempt to keep their name in the headlines if not the social pages.  The star system in New York, however, is a tad different than it is in Hollywood and the flavor a bit more up close and personal. Not everyone can handle it.

Hollywood celebrities often require civilian guests and press to remain at an uncomfortable arms length distance which can take away from the intimacy of an event. I recall being almost knocked to the ground by an overzealous body guard several years ago inside the tent at Tavern on the Green at a benefit for the Fresh Air Fund. The reason? I was a guest, without a camera (yes there was a time Chris London, B.C., before camera) within 50 feet of Mariah Carey (who by the way in my estimation looks alot better now with more junk in the trunk and on the grill as well) who was coming in with an entourage and my back happened to be to the entrance.

It is the illusive but accessible quality of "the socialite" that gives her a powerful star like draw which in many cases exceeds that of celebrities. Ask any event planner what it means in New York City to have Amanda Hearst, Lydia Hearst or Gillian Hearst in attendance at your social event with or without Anne Hearst and the man who wrote the quintessial modern New York novel which brought the world's focus to an element of New York Nightlife in his book Bright Lights Big City, Jay McInerney. Beauty, wealth and education seem to enhance one's pedigree whether you trace your roots to the Mayflower, 5th Avenue, the Hamptons, Palm Beach or even Forest Hills. As one who has photographed many of the leading "stars" of New York Society, the thoughtful photographer must appreciate the need to be creative but efficient in how you photograph them. Do not monopolize their precious time because others will need to photograph them. The Socialite must be permitted to find a comfort zone that enables her to relax and enjoy the event so that the pleasure of her company may be enjoyed by many, including her personal and intimate network of confidants who undoubteldy came to lend their support for the evenings charitable recipient. This is the reason why I will usually keep my dialoque brief and polite wth the Hearst Girls, Debbie Bancroft, Coralie Charriol Paul, Tinsley Mortimer, Allison Aston, Bettina Zilkha, Zani Gugelmann, Alex Lind Rose, Mona Wyatt, Emilia Fanjul Pfiefler (and her office full of model like socialite babes every one stylish, wall mannered and beautiful as the next) etc etc. These women are sexy, beautiful and engaging creatures but frankly they are part of "the show" and last I checked I was not the only one with a ticket.

Society's stars pump up the volume in a look at me way that well says...look at New York. Look at our beautiful venues, great art and architecture and these wonderful charitable organizations, and the people behind them even if it sometimes feels that charity is an afterthought and not the preveiling thought. And yes look at some of the great work of fashion designers being done in the Fashion Capital of the World.  For some reason a highball at McFadden's Pub does not taste quite the same as does a glass of Veuve Clicquot in a Champagne glass at the Park Avenue Armory or on a schmooze cruise aboard The Highlander, the Forbes Family Yacht, in the New York Harbor while flirting with a Hearst, a Forbes or one of the other young, beautiful and upwardly social ladies of Manhattan. For those who Gawk and poke fun at this "scene" recognize, they have also enabled your journalistic career to some degree. Cheers and welcome to 2006 where the show is just getting underway.

AMERICAN LEGACY

On November 11, 2005, Veterans Day in America, I was invited to attend the Danish American Society "Man of the Year" Awards Gala Dinner at the Rainbow Room in Rockefeller Center. Ambassador John L. Loeb, Jr., former Ambassador to Denmark during the first Reagan Administration, a prominent descendant of both the Lehman & Loeb banking families who can trace his family ties in America, back to the 17th century was honored as Man of the Year by the Danish American Society. to see all the photos from the event, click here.

Dignitaries, friends, co-workers/employees and family came to honor this financier, philanthropist, patriot, vineyard owner, art connoisseur (with an extensive Danish Art Collection on exhibit at the Frances Lehman Loeb Center and the Bruce Museum). The evening's highlights included a showing of the colors from both Denmark and the United States followed by the respective national anthems of both countries; heartwarming speeches and most memorably a light hearted biographical film produced by Sharon Handler. The legacy of Mr. Loeb is that of an enlightened American who has achieved high levels of success on so many playing fields in the game of life including business, international affairs, politics and used the station of his success to make meaningful cultural contributions.

Admirably, for a man of such enormous success and accomplishment who's very essence defines what it means to be a "Renaissance Man," what seemed to have enriched his life the most is a profound sense of humility, his love of country, the love, respect and admiration of those around him; his appreciation of art and culture and his devotion to building community and relations between countries. The quiet confident passion of the man self evident, his humility and sense of humor illustrate that Mr. Loeb pursued his path for the love of the journey and not for the accolades which have come his way.

The warmth that filled the Rainbow Room on this particular evening left this writer wanting to be a better man, a better American. Naturally, I became introspective about my relative purpose and the meaning of my life as an American.

What does it mean to be an American? That is a hard question for many. Certainly there are those who have different theories or answers. There are, however, some inescapable truths. Americans are descendants from or former citizens of nearly every country in the world. Americans include those who were born here as well as those who choose to apply and accept the privilege of citizenship. The American who becomes a citizen today is as much a part of the  fabric of American life and culture as those who trace their heritage back to the founding of our country, such as the DAR.  There are challenges and responsibilities that go along with being American. American citizenship is neither to be taken for granted nor is it something that we be arrogant about. The unique position of America in the world today necessitates a broader outlook. To be an American requires that we celebrate our uniquely American traditions, even as we continue to establish them, while embracing the cultures of those which enrich our own, or look to America for leadership on the world stage.

In the melting pot which is New York City, where we all too often proudly exhibit and display our ethnic heritage, do we ever bother to ask ourselves what it means to be an American? My friends often proudly state, "I am Italian, I am Latino, I am African American or I am Jewish", which is all fine and good. But is it not equally important to reflect on and consider the blessing it is to simply be an American? Too nationalistic? Perhaps but that is without any disrespect to the fact that one's ethnic heritage is something to be proud of. With all due respect to my ethnic heritage, the cultural mix which is my blood, and which I am quite proud of for sure, I am first and foremost and American and a New Yorker. 

What is the role of Americans in the world today? To be an American carries with it a responsibility to become an enlightened citizen of the world.  First and foremost it requires that one be a Patriot for America with a focus on building community here at home.  That, however, must be balanced looking forward with a commitment to developing an understanding, a sense of community and appreciation for the cultures which have and continue to contribute to enriching American life. Respect first the many that have died to establish and maintain a free society on American soil. But understand and appreciate that the history of the United States begins with a profound appreciation for the cultures and the people which have and continue to shape the basis of our existence. The American experience is a constant evolution.

The greatest honor that one can have bestowed on them in life is the love and respect of one's peers, family and country men. Ambassador Loeb has succ eeded on all those levels. I am proud to call Ambassador John L. Loeb, Jr., simply an American. His passion, convictions, character and humility make him one that we could do far worse than to emulate. I salute Ambassador Loeb for a life well lived. God bless.

*Note: Thie piece appears in the Manhattan Society Report, Christopher London's Society Column in PRESTIGE MAGAZINE (Asia) in the February issue.

GIULIANI TOWN

A society report of any kind that does not begin or end with the Giuliani's is, in the estimation of this writer, rather incomplete. Rudolph W. Giuliani was recently recognized by New York's top news radio station 1010 WINS at the 1010 Wins 40th Anniversary Gala at Gotham Hall as the most influential newsmaker of the last 40 years. In 2005, 4 years removed from the tragedy of 9/11 and its devastating impact on New York City, and almost 4 years since he left office as New York's Mayor and became America's Mayor, Rudolph W. Giuliani ("Rudy") remains one of the most prominent and respected faces on the Manhattan charity scene. By his side in a very significant way in her own right, is his wife Judith S. Giuliani (the former Judy Nathan). In 2005 at the New York Junior League Winter Ball Ms. Giuliani was honored for her work with Changing Our World, Inc., a national fundraising and philanthropic services company headquartered in New York as well as with other charities. Judy is also a founding member of the board of trustees of the Twin Towers Fund which raised and distributed all of the $216,000,000 to over 600 families and individuals. Contributions to the Fund also created the TTF Scholarship Fund and America's Camp.  Mrs. Giuliani currently serves as the Executive Director of the $100,000,000 Campaign for St. Vincent Catholic Medical Centers in New York.  Mrs. Giuliani does more than "stand by her man"and is very much a force in her own right. (Photo: Judith S. Giuliani & Rudolph W. Giuliani at the Tuesday's Children 2005 Leadership Awards Gala at Cipriani, by Gregory Partanio for Manhattan Society.com)

An incomparable tandem, the Giuliani's are the quintessential New York power couple. More than merely serving as charismatic leaders, the Giuliani's have and continue to make a profound difference to the fabric of urban life and the lives of New Yorkers on a daily basis. While the Giuliani's are certainly outfront, most often as headliners, their service to our community is not limited to speaking engagements at grand events. Whether serving on boards of charities with worthwhile goals, sponsoring fundraisers for other organizations, speaking or serving in a motivational capacity, their involvement has a multiplier effect. The Giuliani's not only sell tickets but they inspire further good deeds. That you do not constantly see them on certain "Society pages" is hardly relevant. Whatever they do and wherever they go it is NEWS.

Case in point, the Giuliani's recently attended a benefit to support Tuesday's Children where their commitment to New York was lauded by the charitable organization's founder:

"Four years ago Mayor Giuliani made a promise that he would stand behind the families of 9/11," said Chris Burke, president and founder of Tuesday's Children Foundation. "He has never waivered in that commitment. For the families of  9/11 and indeed the world, Mayor Giuliani has become a symbol of strength and hope. Like our families, he knows that healing comes with time and through persistence and determination. Today in large measure because of his leadership, New York City is stronger than ever and our 9/11 families are on the road to recovery. As both a family member and president of this organization, it is my honor and privilege to present Mayor Giuliani and the New York Mets with the Tuesday's Children Leadership Awards for 2005," concluded Burke.

Mayor Giuliani said,"Nothing can ever completely fill the void in our hearts created by 9/11. As a nation and as a city, we can rebuild with bricks and mortar. But for those who lost loved ones that day, rebuilding lives is a much more difficult task. And that is why Tuesday's Children is so important. Its programs provide strength, guidance and a clear path to a happier future for thousands of families. And while I am proud to receive this Leadership Award tonight, I am still humbled at the strength, resilience and faith of so many who lost so much that terrible day four years ago."

New York is my home town. My respect for Rudy Giuliani is rather personal. The soul of the man is evident in all that he does. If  that is not confirmation enough, all you need do is get up close and personal, shake his hand and look in his eyes. The qualities of a loving but fearless leader are ever present. That he found Judith is a well deserved blessing. If that sounds too corny than you obviously have never met the man.

Certainly there are those who may have disagreed with certain aspects of his leadership style prior to 9/11. Those people, however, are quick to forget the challenges which Mr. Giuliani overcame to govern.  Rudy Giuliani inherited a metropolis in decline. Mr. Giuliani's assumption of the Mayoralty of New York City in the 1990's was probably the single biggest factor in the rebirth of New York City. He redirected the fortunes of a city which too many of his predecessors, some of whom were more "beloved" politicians, deemed ungovernable. They failed before they even started. I and many others shudder to imagine what might have been had Rudy Giuliani had not been our Mayor on that fateful day of  September 11, 2001. Furthermore, he cared enough about the legacy of New York to expend personal and political capital to assure that an individual with sound fiscal and administrative leadership qualities would serve as his successor.  In the aftermath of 9/11, what New York needed was a CEO who could make tough political decisions, decisions that might infuriate both Republicans and Democrats. The current Mayor, Michael Bloomberg for all his fortune might never have had the opportunity to inherit the Mayoralty absent Mr. Giuliani's endorsement.

Leadership is in the details. I salute Rudolph W. Giuliani, not just for serving as a charismatic and inspirational leader or for rescuing New York City twice but also for paying attention to the details and for continuing to give back to the community when it would have been far easier to rest and enjoy the comfort zone from the income generated by his consulting firm, Giuliani Partners. So while Michael Bloomberg has just been re-elected to a second term with most New Yorkers saying "mazel-tov" in providing his landslide victory over Fernando Ferrer, New York City is still Giuliani Town to me.

*Note: This column also runs in my Society Column in the December Holiday issue of Social Life Magazine (New York) and PRESTIGE Magazine in Asia (Singapore, Hong Kong, Thailand, Indonesia & Malaysia)

FRIDAY: The Social Sabbath

Friday night for me is generally the social sabbath. Once I leave my office rarely will you find me any place but the temple for my body or resting in the solitude of my apartment, alone in my bed on Friday evening. Navigating the work week and divying up the social calendar with Gregory in order to make it to Friday with my sanity in tact is a weekly exercise. As many New Yorkers know, unlike other cities, Friday Night is usually the least important of the social networking nights around town.

Social Life in Manhattan can be overwhelming at times. The volume of private parties, special events and charitable fundraisers is seemingly limitless, especially of late with the NYC Relief for Hurricane Katrina fully underway. What one chooses to patronize is a function of your interests, values, goals as well as obviously your level of access, not to say anything of whatever spare time and energy you have left after working like a typical New Yorker, which is quite hard. For many, not being on the list or being able to get in becomes the raison d' etre for going to a certain event. I am convinced that the success of certain events in this town is purely a result of a short guess list and then publicizing or leaking it to the world at large only to provide event planners and publicists the option to choose from among those who angle or beg for inclusion. (Photo: Shaun Rose, Alicia Post & Joe Richards of Fuel For Truth and Chris London at the recent American Red Cross fundraiser at Rock Candy for Victims of Hurricane Katrina sponsored by Theorice which raised nearly $10,000)

The week started out in promising fashion with a cocktail party to celebrate the 40th Anniversary of the D&D Building. But, it was also Fashion Week, the United Nations was in session and it seemed like every dignitary on the planet was in the city for that or for the Clinton Global Initiative. Leave it to Bill Clinton to figure out how to remain the leader of the free world, a President without borders, wielding more power out of office than he had in office.  An extraordinary volume of partying and fundraising continues around our town for victims of Hurricane Katrina. The most prevalent symbol on the New York social scene has been the logo of the American Red Cross. Even if some believe that "Charities Are For Suckers" and that Hurricane Katrina Relief should be best left to the federal government, the level of fundraising activity rivals that of post 9/11. Ironically four years later as we contemplate rebuilding the Gulf Coast region and New Orleans, there is still an empty space where the Twin Towers once stood. What really disturbs me beyond the obvious is the incompetence of a host of regional politicians who have not made rebuilding the towers a greater priority. As if traffic around town was not jammed enough, The Feast of San Gennaro on Mulberry Street contributed to the sense that everything important was in New York City all at once.

New York is buzzing yet I have remained a voyeuer on the sidelines for much of the past week, sucking up the news online and in the newspapers. I have been feeling somewhat introspective of late and desirous of greater intimacy than the volume of large scale events around town seem to provide.  When I walked out of my office to get another Starbucks coffee on Friday, I could not help but notice how the Sheraton hotel which was location for the CGI was guarded like Fort Knox.  So what did I do? I opted to mix amongst friends in more intimate settings.

On Thursday Night I was invited by friend, Susan Shin of "Shin Advisors" to cover The Grand Opening of the the Sara Tecchia Roma-New York Gallery on West 20th Street. The evening featured Water Flames by Makoto Fujimura. Mr. Fujimura's Water Flames Exhibition will continue through October 23rd with Artist Talk "A Journey Behind Water Flames" scheduled for October 7th from 7-9 PM. The vibe in the gallery was superb, a great mix of art connoseurs and a beautiful and ecelectic array of uptown and downtown movers and shakers who mixed, mingled and enjoyed the Oriel Wine served along with yummy passed hors d'ouevres. Afterwards, a cocktail party and a spectacular home style gourmet Italian dinner was held upstairs at Fiamma in Soho for friends of the gallery, and I am pleased to report that that I concur with the excellent reviews that Fiamma has already previously received. (Photo: Sara Tecchia, Makoto Fujimura & Susan Shin)

On Friday evening, I broke my cardinal rule and head to FIZZ to meet Mona Wyatt and friends for an intimate gathering to celebrate her birthday. The bubbly was poured, Veuve Clicquot to be precise, and we toasted the sexy and philanthropically inclined red head who admirably used her birthday to raise funds for one of her favorite charities, Stages of Learning. The three additional Bombay Sapphire gimlets on the rocks that I added to the bubbly made for a long slumber on Saturday. But you know I am feeling happy and relaxed when I order the Bombay ;-)  (Photo: Dawn Palo, Mona Wyatt & Christine Cachot) more photos

*Note: Look for links to the full photo albums soon. Sorry for the delay.

HAMPTONS COLOR WARS: Color me "Blue"

Fashionably late is what I am. That is what I was thinking while anxiously doing some last minute shopping for lavender and periwinkle colored shirts at the Polo store in Southampton. Why? I had to have my colors before the weekend’s festivities. Adult "color wars" are representative of the fabric of the values and culture out east much in the same way that color war was for me as kid at Summer Camp. How else can I explain my inability to comprehend the big picture? Some say the bell goes off in the Hamptons on Memorial Day. Still others insist that it is the opening weekend of a key benefit or the commencement of Polo. I won’t argue as to when the Hamptons color wars get started. It is only clear that when they end is after the Hamptons Classic. Showmanship is an extension of the art and spirit of philanthropy and social revelry in the Hamptons. If event planners and designers are going to do their part in creating the perfect backdrop, then the least that I can do is choose my colors appropriately. (Photo: Anne Hearst, Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., Amanda Hearst & Randy Hearst at the BLUE Benefit.)

When I was 10 years old, my parents sent me along with my brother Gregory to Summer Camp. Camp Good News is located in the Sandwich area of Cape Cod. The campgrounds are situated opposite Otis Air Force Base. Martha's Vineyard and Nantucket are only a short Ferry ride away. My summers were very Kennedy'esque even though they were spent on grounds which were far more humble than the Kennedy Compound in Hyannisport. We too, however, we learned the spirit of competition, sportsmanship, the importance of our maker and the values of responsibility, respect, honor and community. What was most memorable, however, from those summers in New England, was color war. Color war was an annual ritual which was symbolic of the values building experience of the Camp.(Photo by: CL, Jay McInerney, Anne Hearst, Kerry Kennedy & Laurie & Larry David) 

Almost upon arrival at Camp shortly before Independence Day the buzz among experienced campers or "old timers" (those for whom this was not their first summer) was about color war. Competition was sized up in all athletic endeavors from the softball field, the lake and the rifle and archery ranges. "Wow you can really hit, I hope you end up on our team this summer." Color war is an event where the camp was divided in two teams to compete in sports, spirit, and sportsmanship over the course of three days, culminating in an awards ceremony. At my camp, we never knew precisely what day it would begin. The exact date was kept a secret but we were advised that it would begin with a bell being rung followed by the rallying cry "Odie Baloney let's go" on a loudspeaker by our Head Counselor who was known as "Oakie" for obvious reasons. Let's just say he was not a New Yorker. I can still remember went that bell first went off. It was approximately 4:30 a.m. before the crack of dawn. We stumbled out of our bunks, cabins emptied and ran to the reporting line in PJ's, shorts and t's, sweats and in some cases just underwear. When everyone finally made it to the line, the team that got its whole team together first was awarded the first points and got to give their rallying cry. My brother's team won."Give me an L, give me a yell, give me a good successful yell...and when we yell we yell like a bell and this is what the heck we yell aleman aleman alemande agle sandy eagle ...baby in a high chair...who put him up there...ma...pa...sis boom ba.... Iguana's Iguana's rah rah rah" (Photo: Roopal Patel, Frederick Andersen, Lorraine Bracco & Douglas Hannant)

On Saturday, August 13th, Anne Hearst & Lorraine Bracco hosted The Riverkeeper’s Blue Benefit overlooking a gorgeous east end backdrop from the grounds of Anne Hearst’s Watermill Estate, Ash Grove Farm. On a humid afternoon, spacious open white tents were surrounded by a thematic display of Periwinkle “Blue” table clothes atop white cocktail tables and chairs situated on perfectly landscaped grounds, with deep green grass. Amanda Hearst, Riverkeeper's junior committee chair co-hosted the event. Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. was among the featured speakers. Celebrity guests included Larry David & Lorraine Bracco. The utter perfection of this thematic blend of classic colors with those of the environment was not lost on me nor was the effort undertaken to make it so; kudos to Linda Shapiro and her team. Proceeds from the event and the private dinner party held afterwards at the home of Lorraine Bracco raised $150,000 for both Riverkeeper and Peconic Baykeeper. (Photo: R Couri Hay, Pamela Fiori & Roger Webster)

Whereas other events might have wilted in such heat and humidity, the Passion of a Kennedy, combined with the beauty and hospitality of the Hearsts made this evening one of the more special and memorable ones for me in the Hamptons this summer. Anne and Amanda Hearst are two of the most charming and approachable people of American Aristocracy. (Photo by Richard Lewin: Luigi Tadini, Amanda Hearst & Christopher London)

It has everything to do with politics and nothing to do with politics. One need not share Mr. Kennedy’s political agenda environmentally to have a profound appreciation for the passion and conviction coursing through his veins. To have an opportunity as I did to listen to a Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. speech within reaching distance was a privilege I will always remember. His emphasis that our values as a people are tested in the choices that we make in terms of preservation of our environment and water ways in the face of modernization and development is one I am very much in agreement with. Listening to Mr. Kennedy’s impassioned and well reasoned pleas to take meaningful steps and actions towards preservation of the environment one cannot help but think of the historical significance; the travesty it has been for this country and our people as a whole to have been robbed of what many consider America’s elected royal family, a family that has devoted it’s life to public service, from the White House, the Congress to serving as an agent of change for the people. Without public servants of this ilk the important works of a generation may not even ever get pursued, much less accomplished. To that end I salute Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. for remaining in the game on an issue of importance to our ultimate health and survival as a people.

Just a few weeks before, admidst a backdrop awash in Lavendar on the grounds of the Simmons East Hampton Estate for the Art For Life Benefit over $1.35 million was raised. Lavender which was the chosen color to collaborate with nature and the guests did their part to blend in. Contrast that with the Southampton Hospital’s 47 Annual Party, “Summer Safari” which used Safari colors to raise more than $1.5 million. The 3rd Annual White Party Clambake for the Cantor Fitzgerald Relief Fund on the dunes of Indian Wells Beach in Amagansett cast a sea of white on the shores of one of the Atlantic's most pristine beaches with the American Flag blowing in the wind. If nothing else is clear it seems that color themes are ultimately very much a part of the bottom line when swimming in the social game of philanthropy out east. To see photos from these events click here

Better to be fashionably late, than never. It is clear that you must know your colors and wear them appropriately. Speaking of being fashionably late, another one of the more colorful benefits was the Young Friends of the MIPC Hawaii Five-0 Summer Party to benefit Dr. Robert Cancro and the NYU Mental Ilness Prevention Center at the Estate of Anna Anisimova which attracted a beautiful crowd of Wall Street Professionals, models, socialites and Hamptons players. The event was Co-Chaired by my friends Ron Sylvestri and Nichole Wright, among others. Gregory captured the essence of that event. To see photos from that event, click here. (Photo by Gregory Partanio: Ana Anisimova & Dr. Robert Cancro)

Thank you for reading my column in Social Life Magazine this summer. For those of you back in Manhattan please note that on September 22, 2005, I will be Co-Hosting along with Allison Weiss and Chad Burkhardt “The Most Unique Cocktail Party & Auction” at the Forbes Galleries to raise money for the Community Coalition. For more information, go to www.thecommunitycoalition.org Tickets are still available. Please call 610-415-1167. Hope to see you there. All Photos by Manhattan Society.com photographers, Gregory Partanio (PrinceGregory@manhattansociety.com /718-614-7740 ) & Christopher London except as otherwise noted.

Hamptons Hype vs. Artful Living

The spirit of philanthropy is in full bloom and very much alive and well on the east end this summer. It is an annual Hamptons ritual. Cocktails and check writing in grandiose settings filled with beautiful people, dressed in the finest clothes, casual but stylish. I prefer it myself over the urban black tie. "Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" are distilled to an art form in the Hamptons. From Southampton to Easthampton the most affluent who regularly compete against one in another in the game of life on the streets, boardrooms, court rooms and exchanges of the big city bring their friendly competition to see who can give away the most money on the east end of Long Island. From Memorial Day to Labor Day the social calendar is full with a multitude of worthwhile common causes, community and charitable events benefitting those less fortunate. (photo; Betsey Johnson & Lulu Johnson modeling Michelle Farmer designs)

The challenge to the social and charitably minded consumer is how to choose from and between an array of grandiose parties, many of which would shame the Great Gatsby. The social calendar was jammed last weekend. I decided to narrow my social menu to that which was a bit more intimate. On Saturday afternoon, Pebbles Jewelers at 79 Main Street in East Hampton hosted a Champagne Reception & Trunk Show to view Michelle Farmer's New 2005 Jewelry Collection.

The Group for the South Fork hosted a grand opening reception of the Ezair Gallery on Main Street in Southampton last Saturday night. Friends and supporters included Nicole Miller, Cynthia Rowley, Debbie Bancroft, Douglas Hannant, Gillian Hearst-Shaw, Lydia Hearst, Annie Churchill, Tinsley Mortimer, Luigi Tadini, John Flanagan, Ann Colley, Mary Walker and the Group’s President Bob DeLuca. The opening celebrated artist Wanda Murphy’s premier solo show entitled “The Connection”. Lydia and Gillian Hearst-Shaw bought two of her colorful, linear paintings, which the artist says are a “celebration of life”. The abstracts works the sisters purchased are entitled, “I Think I Know” and “Stillness of My Heart” respectively. (Photo: Lydia Hearst, Amanda Hearst & Gillian Hearst Shaw). To see all photos from the evening, click here

An eclectic array of New York fashionistas, artists, socialites, models and media folk were in attendance including Lisa Gastineau, Nina Griscom, Antony Todd, Jamee Gregory and Peter Gregory, Mai Harrison, Somers White, Bettina Zilkha, Jackie and Francois Astier, Tony Ingrao and Randy Kemper, Gwen Rivers, Amanda Hearst and Winston Lapham, Christian Currie and Kathryn Jennings, All My Children’s Jacob Young, Camille Duvall Hero, artist Michael Perez, Melissa Berkelhammer, event planner Harriette Rose Katz, lighting guru Bentley Meeker, Eva and Brendon Dillon, Ann Washburn, Santiago Gonzalez, Campbell Robertson, Nello Balan and models Ines Misan, Heidi Albertsen and Sonja Wanda, the star of the new Mac cosmetics ad campaign. (Photo: Debbie Bancroft & R Couri Hay)

The reception was followed by a cozey dinner at Nello’s next door to the gallery, the new outpost of Nello’s restaurant on Madison Avenue. On one of the busiest evenings in the Hamptons this summer, in an upscale restaurant in Southampton, the bold, the beautiful and the buzz was most certainly here. Proceeds from the sales of the artist’s works from the run of the show are being donated to the Group for the South Fork, the Hamptons only local professionally-staffed environmental advocacy and education organization committed to the preservation of natural resources in East Hampton, Southampton, and Shelter Island since 1972.

Murphy’s figurative paintings are a celebration of her own spiritual journey. Her abstract works have been compared to Chagall and Modigliani. Murphy’s ethereal figures express the struggle between human desires and spiritual evolution. The paintings explore the intimacy between the dream state and reality, expressing a direct connection with divine energy. The nurturing female figures float in a state of grace bathed in the white light of hope, healing and love. (Photo: Nicole Wright, Melissa Berkelhammer & Wanda Murphy)

Wanda says of her art, “I’m trying to bring abstraction and linear together to form what’s called linear abstraction.” She says she is trying to connect people, their passion, and the universe together as one in an attempt to deal with the struggle between spirituality and desire. Murphy feels it is important to live, love, and enjoy each day because life is a great gift. “We ought not to look back at the past or look forward to the future. We should live in the present.” Murphy brings the universal message: You are loved. Murphy has exhibited her paintings across America and Europe.   Her paintings are on permanent display at the Ezair Gallery at 136 Main Street, Southampton, N.Y., the gallery’s flagship at 905 Madison Avenue, New York City, and both the Kenneth Raymond Gallery and the Galleria Royale, which she owns, in Boca Raton, Florida. Murphy is set to open her second gallery in Miami this winter. For more information, please call Murphy’s dealer Marianna Bego for an appointment at 631-204-0442.

While I was comfortably ensconced in my own realm in the Village of Southampton, a multitude of publicists worked behind the scenes to make sure that their client's shindig did not go unnoticed. Pulling crowds from one venue or event to another seems to be the norm. My cell phone was ringing non-stop. "Chris, where should I go? "What's happening at Polo? You going to Sale Johnson's bash at Tavern?" Yeah, I know Tamie Peters and Christiaan McPherson asked me to stop by. Some group called the Elvis White Band is performing right? "Do you know about the party of the Dream Team of Doctors in Wainscott organized by Jane Scher?" Yes. "Lizzie Grubman and her boyfriend Chris Stern are up here........but while the scene is pretty mellow the booze is flowing , hors d'oeuvres are delectable and Dr. Jennifer Jablow is freaking hot!" "Who's going to the party at Madame Tong's JL Beach Club in Southampton?" "What about the Boys Harbor Fireworks?" Anyway, catch you later Chris, I gotta go get another drink. (Photo: Chris Stern & Lizzie Grubman)

The opening day for Bridgehampton Polo had to be one of the Hamptons most over hyped spectacles. I personally received essentially the same Press Release from no less than 3 different publicists hyping the upcoming festivities. Ralph Lauren with his Polo label was perhaps the first to encapsulate and package the 50's American WASP lifestyle via his "Polo" label. Similarly, Bridgehampton Polo has been pre-packaged in a seductive manner utilizing the country backdrop of the Hamptons in an effort to create a perfect picture of socialization among the affluent. The only problem is Bridgehampton Polo does not capture the essence of bygone era in the Hamptons or anywhere else.  Marketeers have rather replaced the lounge or "club" with an upscale outdoor venue in the country, among horses and horsemen and a game that is not even the focus or of interest to many of the revelers. For me the Polo lifestyle is limited to having 20% of my wardrobe from my Ralph Lipschitz, aka Ralph Lauren, King of the schmattas from Brooklyn.

While I was intriqued by the prospect of logging some observation time and stomping the divots at Polo, much like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, the decision was made for me when I responded to the Press Release/Invitation for Bridgehampton Polo. First my reply was ignored. I replied again and then was advised that this was a closed "list" event. It was curious why I was repeatedly sent Press Releases/Invitations to an event which I was not invited to cover and ultimately denied access to "the list" for Polo by the social empressarios at Strategic Group (Noah Tepperberg & Jason Strauss), the Lawlor Media Group and a firm called East Side PR.

To Norah Lawlor's credit, I did actually get a phone call apologizing and was extended an invitation to another grand opening party for Madame Tong's at JL Beach Club in Southampton, yet another enterprise of Eddie Kleefield, aka Jean Luc. Only in America can a chubby guy with orange glasses change a nice yiddisha name to something a tad more euro and goyish no less and become a massive success. What the JL restaurants have become mostly known for, however, is attracting the quintessential Hamptons scene of young attractive professionals and entrepreneurs. The social vibe is paramount, and it is actually quite good. The consumption of food secondary. The food, at Madame Tong's at JL Beach Club, which I have re-confirmed with several sources is entirely average, and reminiscient of the 1980's inspired Polynesian lounges serving poo poo platters like the Hong Kong in Harvard Square or the former AKU AKU in Kenmore Square, near BU where I went to college.

I certainly have hedonistic tendencies and thus love a good party, good cocktails and beautiful women and surroundings as much as anyone. But how do you know whether to believe the hype about anything out here? In the Hamptons, if you believe the hype, you can make yourself crazy. As there always seems to be something cooler or more worthwhile than wherever you plan to be. The sad part is that some people actually believe that and spend their entire weekend perpetually in transit searching for that illusive "best scene."

Life for me is made up of the little moments. People, conversation, good libations and intimate and eclectic atmosphere. On Saturday evening, I found that courtesy of Couri Hay, my friends Mona Wyatt, philanthropic banker and urban athlete Dawn Palo and her friend, one of America's Best Doctors, Dr. Curtis W. Slipman (Director, Penn Spine Center. Chief, Division of Muscoskeletal Rehabilitation) who over dinner and drinks at Nello's gave my brother, Manhattan Society.com Photography Editor, Gregory Partanio, some well needed referrals and advice concerning repair and treatment of his herniated disks. (Photo: Mona Wyatt, Nello Balan & Heidi Alberston)

I glimpsed briefly at photos taken by social shutterbug Rob Rich, and realized that other than Owen Wilson, the Butterscotch Stallion, I did not miss much at Bridgehampton Polo . In fact, I received several emails from disappointed female contingent saying that all they saw was a bit of a busted club scene of pretenders, and "allegedly" rich guys in toupee's posing with models at Bridgehampton Polo. Oy vey! One even remarked that it was nothing like the Polo scene she had seen out at The Mashomack International Polo Challenge chaired by Bruce Colley & Camilla Hellman earlier this summer or anything like the movie Pretty Woman. So I missed nothing, essentially in enjoying a rich meal in decadent surroundings with friends and a who's who of New York's social jet set at Nello's in Southampton. All Photos by Gregory Partanio

ARTist FOR LIFE: Russell Simmons, Rush Philanthropic

On Saturday, June 25th I picked up my brother Gregory again and we head to the East Hampton home of Russell Simmons & Kimora Lee Simmons to attend an intimate invitation only "Art For Life Kick Off Your Shoes Kick Off Cocktails." This cocktail party was to serve as a precursor to the upcoming signature Hamptons Event the 2005 Art For Life East Hampton Garden Party Benefit also to be held on July 30, 2005 at the home of Russell & Kimora Lee Simmons. There is no question that this was an invitation that both Gregory and I were quite pleased to have accepted.

Upon arrival at the elegant but tastefully understated and comfortably decorated home of Mr. & Mrs. Simmons we were graciously greeted by Vanessa Rodriguez and Tangie Murray both of Rush Philanthropic Arts Foundation as well as Mr. Simmons. In my estimation, the man unquestionably deserves to be referred to a Mr. or Sir; from his humble roots in Hollis, Queens not far from where I was born (Jamaica Hopital) and raised in Queens to his position as the head of the hip hop movement in the United States and the free world combined with his significant philanthropic bent. When Gregory first introduced himself to “Mr. Simmons”, he nodded his head and smiled at Gregory insisting that there was no need for such formality. Instantly we were at ease.

I admit to having been long curious of Russell Simmons the man. The man has achieved mythical status as a promoter, entrepreneur, producer and enabler of the artistic talents of so many in the hip hop community, not just in terms of music but also fashion and style. The careers of far too many to mention here have flourished as a result of his nurturing of their talents. Even though I had never personally met the man, I have known people directly and indirectly who have been touched by Russell Simmons. My friend Martha Gold, a licensed physical therapist who also happens to be the best massage therapist at the Russian Turkish Bathouse in the East Village advised me that Russell Simmons not only inspired her to pursue a yoga lifestyle but also to start a program teaching disabled children yoga in the New York City Schools working for the New York City Department of Education in the Bronx, see Yoga Wonderland.

The kick off began at 6:30 in the tranquil and immaculately landscaped setting of the Simmons backyard in East Hampton, much like a scene out of an old Americana Norman Rockwell painting; trees, grass, and a backyard swing over overlooking a modern Bonsai Garden pool area. The list of attendees included but was not limited to: Jason Binn, Lyor Cohen, Fred Davis, Star Jones Reynolds, Shamin Abas & and Frank Cilione, Michelle Farmer, David Negri of Sutka Productions, Frances Hayward, Mrs. And Mr. Frank Cooper, Michael and Annie Falk, Victor Matthews and Hedy Klineman, Teresa Savory and Javier Evans, JellyBean Benitez and Family, Kim Maitland, Jeff Burroughs, Mrs. and Mr. Craig Williams, Nancy Chemtob, Jenny Kroft, Chris and Alison Brown and Steve Kroft, Brett and Yvonna Wright and Family.

As the guests began to arrive, Gregory took some informal photos while I enjoyed the Coppola Diamond Sauvignon Blanc and Sofia Blanc de Blancs sparkling wine that was served with an eclectic array of delectable hors d’ouevres. Russell Simmons quiet energy was readily apparent as each guest gravitated towards and conferred with him. It was obvious how each guest was uniquely drawn to him and not merely because he was the host. Russell Simmons graciously made time for our photos. At approximately 7:45 when Mr. Simmons spoke to the attendees as a group about the mission of Rush Philanthropic and the upcoming Annual Art For Life Garden Party Benefit at the East Hampton home of Russell & Kimora Lee Simmons, there was an angelic, earnest, missionary like aura to him. There was no obligatory paying of attention to the host that you find at many charitable cocktail parties.

None of the adjectives used to describe Russell Simmons by the popular media (entrepreneur, promoter, producer, entertainment mogul, media baron etc.)encapsulate the quiet energy which radiates from the persona of this man. It is clearly evident that first and foremost this is a spiritual man with passion, conviction and integrity who has not forgotten where he came from. There is a synergy between his success as an entrepreneur molding, nurturing and promoting the talents of many in the hip hop community to utilizing his talents, skills and contacts to do the very same for the artistic talents of the younger generation in New York City Schools. Basically, Rush Philanthropic is a charity that makes sense; it is an extension of the man. Russell Simmons represents.... the best of what New York is all about; he is the kind of man you want and root to succeed in America. He is not just the heART and soul of hip hop movement but of capitalism itself.

The annual ART FOR LIFE Garden Party Benefit at the East Hampton home of Russell Simmons & Kimora Lee Simmons is Rush Philanthropic’s most important annual fundraising effort, attended annually by a sold out audience of more than 700 leaders in the entertainments, arts, business and philanthropic communities. Rush Philanthropic Arts Foundation is dedicated to providing disadvantaged urban youth with significant exposure and access to the arts, as well as providing exhibition opportunities to underrepresented artists and artists of color. While its primary emphasis is the arts, Rush Philanthropic is committed to the general well being of young people by considering a wide range of concerns. It was founded in 1995 by brothers Russell, Danny, and Joseph Simmons and its Board of Directors includes leaders in the arts, education, entertainment, and business communities. Since its inception, Rush has provided grants to dozens of non-profit organizations, including Donor’s Choose, Impact Repertory Theatre, Urban Word NYC, Free Arts for Abused Children, Art Start, Studio in a School, Arts Connection, SHiNE, P.E.N.C.I.L., Jackie Robinson Steppers, Children’s Pressline, and the Northside Center for Child Development, and has served countless visual artists through the exhibitions and activities of Rush Arts Gallery and Resource Center.

ART FOR LIFE is Rush Philanthropic’s primary outreach to friends and supporters. Through this event, they are able to serve thousands of children by helping them acquire the skills needed to build a successful life.

As the party came to a close around 9 PM, Russell Simmons conversed with several of us in his driveway as his valets individually pulled our cars around. I was able to snap one more final picture of my brother, Manhattan Society.com photography editor, Gregory Partanio with Russell. Despite his success and high profile, Russell Simmons remains humble, accessible and earnest, a rare thing these days indeed for a man of his accomplishment; a born leader who does not intimidate but rather ingratiates with his humble style and sincere manner. We left. I dropped Gregory off at The Palm East Hampton to take the Hampton Jitney back to the city. I stayed the night and went to dinner at Nick & Toni’s with designer Michelle Farmer, Shamin Abas & Frank Cilione, and some of their friends, including the beautiful Salene Parnese and actress Holly Perkins. We enjoyed spirited dialogue, great food and a few more glasses of wine. The only thing missing was my friend Deborah Weiner who is now the Spa Director of the Heart of Palm Beach Hotel, without whom I never would have connected with this lovely group of people in the first instance.

Tickets to ART FOR LIFE start at $1,000 per person. For further information please contact Tangie Murray, Director of Marketing and Sponsorship at 212.997.3034 or tmurray@rushphilanthropic.org or Vanessa Rodriguez, Director of Special Events at 212.997.3020 or vrodriguez@rushphilanthropic.org

Summer in the Hamptons (Part 1): The Group For The South Fork Benefit & Auction

1. More than a Feeling
2. The Group For The South Fork
3. Looking Ahead: The “Must List” as opposed to the “A” List

More than a Feeling

On Saturday June 18, 2005 I left my apartment on the Upper East Side of Manhattan, got into the Jeep and head to The Group for the South Fork Benefit & Auction at the Wolffer Estate Vineyard. As I passed through the city limits and hit the Northern State Parkway, encountering minimal traffic I became immersed in the music playing on the radio. I was feeling somewhat introspective about summers past and what might lay for me ahead this year when while listening to Jack 101.1 FM ironically an anthem from my summer youth on Cape Cod, "More than a Feeling" written by Tom Scholz from the Band, Boston came on the radio.

I looked out this morning and the sun was gone
Turned on some music to start my day
I lost myself in a familiar song
I closed my eyes and I slipped away

It’s more than a feeling, when I hear that old song they used to play (more than a feeling)
I begin dreaming (more than a feeling)
’till I see marianne walk away
I see my marianne walkin’ away

So many people have come and gone
Their faces fade as the years go by
Yet I still recall as I wander on
As clear as the sun in the summer sky

It’s more than a feeling, when I hear that old song they used to play (more than a feeling)
I begin dreaming (more than a feeling)
’till I see marianne walk away
I see my marianne walkin’ away

When I’m tired and thinking cold
I hide in my music, forget the day
And dream of a girl I used to know
I closed my eyes and she slipped away
She slipped away. she slipped away.

It’s more than a feeling, when I hear that old song they used to play (more than a feeling)
I begin dreaming (more than a feeling)
’till I see marianne walk away
I see my marianne walkin’ away.

-Tom Scholz

So many profound and memorable experiences in my life have occurred between Memorial Day and Labor Day from falling in love with a woman I wanted to marry, to breaking up with someone I cared for deeply to the death of my father. Music has a way of affecting me. It transports me back to memories of specific times, places and people. There is unquestionably a gravitational pull for me each year to discover/experience something new on the East End of Long Island, even if it is only something about myself. In the midst of the summer sun, long days at the beach and generous helpings of local wine, I somehow always seem to find it. Also if you know how to socialize, it becomes easier to find intellectually compatible people who’s dialogue influences and enables your own dreams. The dreams of life, for me, are seen through the eyes of a beautiful woman and the long legs of a full bodied glass of local wine in the Hamptons sun. This summer I hope to have the opportunity to make some meaningful connections which alter the course of my life; romantically or otherwise. It is what I aspire to. Who knows what is in store for me? And I say that with pleasure and not apprehension or fear. I embrace the uncertainty of the future much in the same way a young child anticipates opening his presents on Christmas morning. It is a glass is half full rather than half empty outlook. I do not fear what might happen. I look forward to what could happen. Perhaps this year, however, I will close my eyes, no longer dream of a girl I use to know and forget the one that slipped away. That in it self would be an accomplishment.

Far from being entrenched in the local community, I do not own a home in the Hamptons nor am I a fixture on the local social scene. As somewhat of an outsider who’s life is firmly based in Manhattan, in quarters which are far more humble than many of the homes I visit, I have a unique vantage point. Dropping in to observe, take notes, snap a few photos makes it easier to blend in and capture the essence of what is happening without drawing to much attention to myself. It took me a long time to realize that what my parents told me as a kid was true. “Christopher, you will learn more by listening and observing than speaking and illustrating how much you do not know.”

Each visit is refreshing and different. My objective is not to “out scoop” another journalist, expose some one well known or snap a photo that nobody will ever get. Much to the contrary, the objective is to study and understand the motivations and aspirations of select individuals, especially the social and charitably minded. Since this is my passion, I have the luxury of covering people and organizations who’s mission inherently interest me.

The Group For The South Fork Benefit & Auction.

I have reverence for those who through their power of pocket, influence or both devote themselves to one of mankind’s highest callings, which is preservation of the environment in which we live. As a proud New Yorker who loves the city, this state, and what being a New Yorker means, I have a special regard for those who focus their attention in particular on the preservation of our local natural resources, from Central Park to the Hamptons.

The Group for the South Fork held their annual benefit and auction on Saturday, June 18 at the Wölffer Estate Vineyard on Sagg Road in Sagaponack, Long Island. Almost 500 supporters turned out on a picturesque evening to fill the spacious, white festive tents set up on the vineyard grounds, to raise over $515,000 for The Group for the South Fork, the Hamptons only local environmental advocacy and educational organization, committed to preserving and protecting the natural resources in East Hampton, Southampton and Shelter Island for over 30 years.

Among the attendees were event Chairman Dick Cavett, who helped with the live auction which brought in $92,000,designer Nicole Miller, Ellin and Ron Delsener, Ann Colley of the Moore Charitable Foundation (directed by Louis Bacon & his wife Cynthia Ingraham), Somers White, Cynthia and Dan Lufkin, Debbie Bancroft, Jonathan Farkas, WB11 News Anchor Jim Watkins and his wife Lauren Thierry, designer Douglas Hannant and Frederick Anderson, Chappy Morris and Melissa Stanley, Congressman Tim Bishop, Richard Johnson and Sessa von Richtofen, Cindy Adams and Robert Zimmerman, Alix Michel and Van Cushny, designer Michelle Farmer and husband Peter Farmer, attorney Sal Strazzullo and Maxim cover girl Jodi Fanelli, chic cleaners Madame Paulette’s John Mahdessian and Beata Borowska, pop artist Michael Perez of Southampton’s Job’s Lane Pop Art Gallery, Charlie and Kristen Krusen, Amy and John Griffin, Lizzie Mitchell, Brandon Pracht, Heather Henricksen, Melissa DeMouche and Scott Lamb, Hayley and Stuart Boesky, Roy Judelson and Mary Judelson, President Bob DeLuca and Christian Wölffer who hosted.

As guests entered the cocktail tent, they couldn’t help but notice the orange lights glowing on the bar, while classic sounds of the keyboard filled the room. Over 100 silent auction items were on display and included items from David Yurman, Ralph Lauren, Alvin Ailey Dance Theatre, Kevin Maple Salon, a three night stay at the HRH Resort’s Hampton Baby Beach Club, a shopping outing with style guru Barbara Sussberg, Michael Perez’ hand painted designer jeans, hand-crafted outdoor garden fountain designed in Bali, Indonesia courtesy of The Furniture Garden, and a 27” Panasonic color television with VCR and DVD courtesy of Sebonack Golf Club. Guests enjoyed hors d’oeuvres such as pan seared Scallops, Wild Mushroom and cheese Quesadillas with mango Salsa and local Long Island Potatoes piped with crème fraiche and caviar. As the crowd moved into the dinner tent, they were wowed by the white lanterns hanging on the ceiling and large bamboo shoots surrounding the poles. The white table clothes were set with pink Peonies and white daisies. Dinner included a Lobster salad and Chicken Breast stuffed with Ricotta and Wild Mushroom stuffing all catered by Janet O’brien Caterers, After the live auction which included items such as an Elvis Presley vacation donated by Robert Sillerman; Golfing at Shinnecock and East Hampton Country Club; a one week stay at a St. Martin Villa, which went for $9,000 donated by Louis and Susan Meisel and was “gotten” by Scott Fleig of Sothebys, guests danced to the Bruce Saunders Orchestra playing sounds of the 70’s and 80’s until midnight.

Later, an after-party was held at Cain at Cabana in Southampton where Fat Joe performed and a host of socialites and celebrities including Star Jones Reynolds, Amanda Hearst, Lauren Bush, Marisa Bregman, Luigi Tadini, Nick Raynes and Patrick McMullan partied into the wee hours.

Looking Ahead: The Must List as opposed to the A List

Over some spirited dialoque, great food and a few glasses of wine  at Nick & Toni’s in East Hampton I discussed with local friends, Shamin Abas, jewelry designer Michelle Farmer their  Hamptons “Must List.” That led me part the way there. When I got back to New York, I consulted with New York’s Top Health & Beauty Publicist Katherine Rothman about her Hamptons “Must List” for the summer and also  took a look at the Hamptons View Summer Calendar and began to reflect.

Summer in the Hamptons is an embodiment of the American Dream. Independence Day is a day of national celebration in the heart of summer. This is when the summer begins in earnest. There is a reason why this is the “land of the free and home of the brave.” Many valiant Americans have fought and died for us to enjoy the American way of life. Our Independence as a people is more than a feeling. It is a cause for celebration, a celebration of life. It is down right unpatriotic to not exercise, relish and enjoy the freedoms granted living in our free society. As you look around you this Independence Day weekend amidst festivities that make the French Bastille Day look like an intimate cocktail party, to quote the Beastie Boys….consider how many Americans had to “fight for your right to party.”

When you encounter long lines in restaurants, your favorite boutiques, lounges and restaurants or traffic on Route 27 rather than getting frustrated, look at it this way instead. Many others are participating in living the American Dream along side of you. There are billions of people around the world who would like to be in your shoes with the opportunity to live the life that you have the opportunity to live. Live it. Love it.

The Hamptons offer an overwhelming and abundant array of choices to celebrate life. One could get brain freeze if you actually stopped to think about it. Recent conversations with friends have centered on what they should be doing and who they should be spending their time with this July 4th weekend and beyond. I was regularly asked how to procure invitations to the proverbial "A" List events? “Chris, what do I need to do to get invited to P. Diddy’s White Party? Their queries, however, seemed more fraught with anxiety and apprehension than genuine enthusiasm or comprehension as to the true significance of "Independence" Day.

Patronizing the right social and charity events in the Hamptons can certainly be a worthwhile social mission. To become consumed or preoccupied, however, with where you think you should be to the exclusion of where you want to be is not only sad but a waste of time. Nearly everything you do in the Hamptons from shopping, getting a spa treatment, dining out, clubbing and patronizing different charity events will afford you the opportunity to mingle among those who are seen regularly in the Society pages of local and national magazines, if that is your thing. While I can vividly recall some of my fondest summer memories indexed by calendar year in the memory banks of brain, many of the best experiences were not planned in pursuit of some misguided notion of what constitutes the "A List".

As I have stated in a previous entry, most of us have grown accustomed to the List, the Velvet Rope, the VIP Section, the Co-op Board etc as symbols or social constructs designed to exclude based upon elements of perceived status or lack thereof. Whether based upon wealth, power, pedigree, beauty, intelligence or artistic, professional or entrepreneurial accomplishment, the process of getting on the list, being considered for the list and attaining it is a sign for many that they have arrived or are connected, wired in etc. Potential exclusion is the attraction. Getting beyond it is obviously the goal for many, especially in the Summer months out East. For many the very idea of it is enough to make one stay at home.

Historical notions of what constitutes "Society", however, have loosened up with the proliferation of luxury lifestyle publications, society columns and photographers who each have their own take on what and who constitutes "Society" but also as a result somewhat with the commercialization and selling of status, including a reality culture gone mad that has given seemingly anyone and everyone their 15 Minutes of fame. As a new friend, Karen Salmon Sohn said to me today, "people used to be famous or well known for a reason but now people are well known for being famous." See also Social Life in a Blender.

While you may still often find some self-appointed guardian of the existing social order who is either assigned to determine or takes it upon him or herself to decide the proper element and whether in fact you qualify for consideration, in the Hamptons your access point to some of the season's most exclusive events is simply via a telephone call to the event planner to purchase a ticket.

My advice instead is to enjoy the summer, hand pick from among the extensive variety of highly publicized events. It is unfathomable that anything will be under publicized in the Hamptons this summer, but if there is an experience or a unique event that you are able to attend and for some reason the "A" List is not out in full force and effect, don’t let that spoil the experience for you. My best summers out east were spent spinning, doing yoga or Lotte Berk in the a.m., sleeping on the beach, casually shopping in the afternoon in East Hampton followed by a dinner at The Palm and meeting friends later on for intimate cocktails. It seems back then I did not know what the "A" List was. Maybe I was better off. Perhaps you will be too. There will be an abundance of mixing opportunities out east from which to pick from; be selective.

INDEPENDENCE. I challenge you instead to muster the courage to get socially introspective and design your own “Must List” of things to do this summer in the Hamptons. Will you commit to living a better, more meaningful and fulfilling life? What is your passion? What do you value? When you dream of summer and specifically summer in the Hamptons, what is it that you dream of? What will fulfill you and make you summer memorable and complete? When the summer is over or years have passed what will you want to remember? What will bring your pleasure, happiness and memories to last a life time? Pursue and craft your experience.

FOOD & WINE

-Breakfast at Poxibog

-Host an intimate and fabulous dinner party at home

-Sunday night dinner and cocktails at Sunset Beach on Shelter Island

-Dinner at Nick & Tonis & The Palm in East Hampton

-Wine tastings at the Wolffer Estate Vineyard

FUN

-Dancing under the stars at the Cantor Fitzgerald White Party Clam Bake Benefit at Indian Wells Beach

-Dancing on the tables at Resort in the white room

-Watching the Fireworks at Boys Harbor

-Shopping the strip in East Hampton, Bridgehampton

SUN: Try a new beach every weekend.

HEALTH & SPIRIT: If you exercise regimen during the work week is intense, centered around weight training, intense cycling or long runs, consider adding something to your program on weekend to nurture and repair your system like yoga, Pilates or massage.

-Yoga by the pool

-Massage: In home, on the beach or poolside. (check the Dan's Papers listings or call my friend, formerly, Manhattan based masseuse Margo Su San at 917-868-5574

* pick up a Dans Papers to check out the directory of listings in the back of the paper weekly.

EVENTS

-7/09/2005 The Parrish Art Museum Midsummer Gala: Special Events Office 631.283.2118 x 41 or email korczakk@parrishart.org

-7/16/2005 The Orchid Ball benefiting the Child Development Center of the Hamptons (631) 267-2734.

-7/23/2005 The Samuel Waxman Cancer Research Foundation's 2nd Annual Hamptons Happening Benefit (organized by event planner Harriette Rose Katz), (212) 241-1760

-7/30/2005 Art For Life (RUSH) Benefit & Garden Party at the home of Russell & Kimora Lee Simmons

-8/20/2005 The Animal Rescue Fund, Bow Wow Dinner Dance: (631) 537-0400.

Consider that the Hamptons offer far more than the opportunity to indulge and party. Many like Katherine Rothman head to seek peace and serenity from the stress of urban life. The Hamptons offer Katherine a platform to do the things that she cannot do in Manhattan. Katherine’s passion is yoga by the pool, patronage of some of the Hamptons best farm stands where she buys flowers to create personalized floral arrangements for all of her house guests. For Katherine, the picturesque scenery of the Hamptons and a simpler style of life are the allure.

Summer for me is about health, relaxation and rejuvenation. Enjoying good wine and intimate, intelligent and spirited conversation in the company of old and new friends fills my soul. Memories of summers past include kissing the woman I love under the stars and fireworks at Sagg Main Beach while we enjoyed a few cold Sam Adams and giggled like teenagers; flirting over cocktails at Sunset in Sag Harbor at B. Smiths; long weekends exploring all the local beaches, relaxing in the sun and reading every local publication; exercising my culinary skills to cook a several course meal for over a dozen friends while enjoying big bold glasses of cabernet sauvignon and grassy sauvignon blancs while listening to Frank Sinatra; dining with a few intimate friends at what will always be my favorite restaurant, The Palm in East Hampton.

More than a feeling and more than a dream, memories are made of dreams fulfilled. You have to be in the game to win the game. I well understand that there is a certain voyeuristic thrill as well as less risk observing from the sidelines. It is often, in fact, what I do with my camera, capturing some of the most beautiful of people enjoying life. But if you do not take a step in the water, a dip in the pool, you will never understand why others are swimming in it. Not all memories, to quote Barbara Streisand, need be “misty water colored memories.” My life as that of many others has certainly been filled with some of those. From the loss of my father which I am sadly reminded of each and every Father’s Day and two romantic breakups which were like kryptonite to this Superman.

Did you break up with someone before the summer started, encounter career transitional issues, have a big business deal blow up in your face? Surely, one must commit to taking the appropriate steps to rectify the ills in your life but it also can begin by filling your memory banks with more positive experiences, social interactions, friends made, times enjoyed. Every day is a new day. A life worth living is one that is constantly evolving forging ahead seeking new terrain. There is a better boyfriend or girlfriend on the horizon, another huge deal to get done and perhaps even a new career path which is yet to be discovered. Get out there, swim with the sharks and you just may encounter a few dolphins along the way to shepherd your journey to a higher place. Dream it, pursue it and live it. This is your life, your summer to take control and design.

I am bemused by prognosticators who annually pronounce the death of the Hamptons rationalizing that those fleeing are doing so to avoid immersing themselves in the self indulgent, opulent and superficial lifestyles of the rich and famous and those on the social circuit vying for their 15 minutes. The theory espoused is that the foregoing alienates vacation goers and if that is not enough a clogged Route 27, a single lane highway through much of the Hamptons will cause a resulting exodus to numerous destinations up and down the eastern seaboard: Woodstock and upstate New York to the Jersey Shore, Newport, Nantucket, Martha’s Vineyard, Cape Cod, Palm Beach and now with the ease of popping down to South Beach on Jet Blue, Florida as well. The above are all fine places to visit but the Hamptons thrive with an annual influx of the old and the new, the young and the old, those that are climbing the food chain and those who are firmly planted high atop the food chain. Writers far more eloquent than me have written extensively on the subject and why people, including you will invariably return to the Hamptons. It is a fact, not mere conjecture. In a nutshell the reasons are very simple.

There is something for everyone in the Hamptons. You love the country, outdoors and nature. You got it. You want a choice of some of the most beautiful and pristine beaches in the world? You got it. Where else can you be in the country and at the beach at the same time? Where else can you drive by a corn field you could swear was in Iowa because it looked like The Field of Dreams, make a turn, drive a ½ mile and look out at the Atlantic Ocean from a white sandy beach? New Yorkers are by nature "foodie's" at heart. How can you not be living in the culinary capital of the world? The endless array of farm stands selling the freshest Long Island grown produce that you will find anywhere is readily available. Long Island corn, tomatoes and strawberries and potatoes are among the best in the world. The wine produced on Long Island in local vineyards is growing immensely in stature on a global basis. Perhaps not quite Napa Valley because the conditions there are certainly more ideal, but a grilled steak from the local butcher in East Hampton with a Long Island potato, fresh corn on the cob and a big bold glass of Long Island Chardonnay works fine with me. Feast on New York I say. Keep local farmers in business and we will all benefit.

Society's Matrons

The preservation and conservancy of beauty, nature’s bounty, is one of society’s highest callings. The task of maintaining/preserving the beauty of our state’s treasures from Manhattan to the Hamptons often seems to be the province of a few of the city’s most well heeled socialites. Take for example, the Women’s Committee of the Central Park Conservancy. (Photo: Karen LeFrak & Gillian Miniter at the Playground Partners East Side Party at the James Levin Playground on May 18, 2005, click here to see photo albums from recent Conservancy events.)

The fundraising efforts of a relatively small handful of women form the backbone of Conservancy funding. The several million that they raise annually through a diverse array of events approaches 15-20% of the park’s annual operating budget. Events such as Playground Partners East/West Side Parties encourage other parents, children and families to serve as stewards of Central Park. The Annual Frederick Law Olmstead Luncheon, a virtual cause celebre among socialite women, raised $2.3 million dollars this year. The Taste of Summer Event hosted by many of the Young Associates of the Women’s Committee serves as the official launch of summer in New York City. (Photo: Stephanie Winston Wolkoff, Samantha Topping & Gillian Miniter at the Playground Partners East Side Party at the James Levin Playground on May 18, 2005)

The women behind these fundraisers bear a disproportionate portion of the cost of preservation while others in our society benefit far more than their relative contributions. Despite the foregoing the efforts of these women go on in earnest with a great deal of passion and enthusiasm. (Photo: Mommies, Christine Cachot Williams & Nina Bauer & their respective daughters at the Playground Partners East Side Party at the James Levin Playground on May 18, 2005)

It is often said that cleanliness is next to godliness. How we choose to attain balance in our lives and otherwise treat the “temple” that is our body with health and fitness regimens, sound nutrition practices and good hygiene is indicative of or a reflection of our value system as a people. If that is the case, then it would logically follow that the ultimate environment in which that temple resides is of equal if not more importance. One would not place a well crafted piece of art work or fine cherry wood furniture in the middle of a toxic waste dump or land fill.  The case for conservancy and preservation thus grows stronger with the passage of time. Lest we underestimate its import or significance in a parallel fashion our respective temples, the body and the environment around us may devolve prematurely into “ruins.”  (Photo: Susan Shin, Lisa Anastos & Adelina Wong Ettelson)

Society’s matrons are in essence “Mother Nature’s” little helpers. While many of these women could be more easily seduced by the creature comforts of their affluent lifestyles, a number of them such as Gillian Miniter, the chairwoman of the Playground Partners benefits, Karen Lefrak, President of the Women’s Committee and other Women’s Committee Members, Samantha Topping, Nina Bauer and Stephanie Winston Wolkoff creatively invest their time, energy and spirit/creativity towards preservation. Notably, Young Associates, Susan Shin, Christine Cachot, Coralie Charriol, Lisa Anastos, Blair Husain, Adelina Wong Ettelson are women to watch as well.  This is counter to the perception that the beautiful women of the aristocratic classes in New York City and the Hamptons merely shop and do lunch. While I am certain that there are those who choose to spend the days that way, others do not. Their social calling is Society’s gain.

Masculine, testosterone filled impulses may have largely led to the erection of buildings, structures and facilities forming the foundation of the metropolis we know of as New York City.   Yet it is the fabric of our community, the glue or feminine aspect which we often take for granted. Feminine instincts allow us to scale back and more methodically develop, preserve and beautify that which we create. It is at this time of the year, flowers in bloom, warm sunny days on pristine New York beaches in the Hamptons, leisurely strolls through the greenery in Central Park that we should reflect on the sublime feminine influences that beautify our culture. Let us celebrate the feminine as much as we revere the masculine. (Photo: Cindy Adams Gossip Column in the New York Post on May 21, 2005)

The social lives of women of means are the grease that fuels essential New York Charity. Let us toast the women of the Conservancy and their like mined fundraising sisters who take up the calling and creatively put the force of their networks towards beautification and preservations of essential aspects of our enviornment. Their intimate and glamorous cocktail and dinner parties as well as family gatherings in the Park are not without purpose. So, you can have the “Desperate Housewives.” Give me instead “Manhattan Mommies on a Mission.” What matters to these women and about these women is far more than their style and good manners, even though both are always quite impeccable and would make Emily Post as well as Tom Ford proud. We are all prime beneficiaries of their efforts.

Thank you to these women of means for not merely setting a great example but also making New York, the Hamptons and my world a better place to live and enjoy life. You are the salt of the earth. What you do nurtures the spirit of mankind.  My summer will be filled with a little more of the pink and green, and the blue and pink, of Lily Pulitzer in honor of you.

Social Life Magazine Party

Justin Mitchell is the Publisher of Social Life Magazine, a magazine launched in the Hamptons in the Summer of 2004. This past Wednesday evening, May 25, 2005, Social Life Magazine held its Hamptons Summer Launch Party at Quo Nightclub located at 511 West 28th Street to celebrate cover model Vanessa Haydon and the first of 6 summer issues. (Photo: Vanessa Haydon & Justin Mitchell) click here to see more photos from the evening.

It was one of the busiest pre-memorial day weekends in New York City. The social calendar was jammed with events of social, cultural and charitable significance all over the city, a number of which I would have been otherwise compelled to cover for Manhattan Society.com, abesent this party.

Justin Mitchell is a man of few words who is always sober and alert, making him an anomaly on the New York social scene. I met Justin through Karen Levy in the Winter of 2002/2003 at a party he held at Room 143 Lounge on Madison Avenue. I barely had a chance to say hello when Justin, seated at a VIP Table, poured me a Ketel One on the rocks with one hand and shook my hand with the other. Our paths have crossed only a few times since.

This past year Justin contacted me to discuss his visions for Social Life Magazine and to ask whether I would be interested in contributing a Society Column and some of my photography to his magazine. His timing could not have been better.  While this is not something that I had actively pursued, my interest in doing so had evolved. Over the past year my work had appeared in a number of print publications including Avenue, Gotham Magazine, Palm Beach Society Magazine, New York Social Diary, The Newport Mercury as well as some hospitality trade publications. I had also had conversations with Zink Magazine through my friend Mona Wyatt.

On Wednesday night when I showed up at Quo, I did not know what to expect. I got there early to meet Kennedy Morse who wanted to interview me for his web site, "AskaNewYorker". I had only been to Quo a couple of times, for a FlirtNYC Party, a couple of charity events and a book party for The Pump Energy Food book. I had invited a few friends but in light of the busy social calendar was not sure who would be in attendance. I had yet to see how my column was edited and my photography laid out in the magazine. While taking some photos of Justin Mitchell, cover model Vanessa Haydon and her fiance Donald Trump, Jr. I caught a brief glimpse of the magazine. My full read will have to wait until after the weekend as the magazine was being distributed exclusively in the Hamptons over the Memorial Day weekend and my plans kept me in the city.

Despite the packed social calendar the crowd at Quo steadily grew throughout the evening. I was also touched that a number of my most social friends, despite having commitments too attend other charitable events which they were involved with, came down to say hello, congratulate me on my column and to appear beautiful as ever in my photos. Special thanks to John Esposito, Nicole Salerno, Susan Shin, Alexandra Wilkis, Maggie Jones from the Children's Aid Society and designer Lindsey Berns, Junior Leaguers, Vivian Soren, Gilda Acosta and Catherine Gordon as well as the beautiful Meiland sisters, Lare Meiland and Lisa Helene Meiland. The smile of Emma Snowdon-Jones filled the room the moment I saw her enter Quo with the always friendly consummate Manhattan Metrosexual Mark Langrish. I was sorry that I did not have more time to mix it up with London Network friends, Elaine Silverstone and Danielle Scherman from the Israel Humanitarian Foundation as well as Allison Hall and Hope Dembowitz.

Tamie Peters, the "personable" nightlife publicist was there with her boyfriend Rich Thomas. I had a chance to chat briefly with Tamie about the expected Hamptons nightlife competition this summer: Southampton vs. East Hampton and which one would pull the proverbial "A" List. Notably, Shamin Abas seems to think that further East will attract the more upscale and mature nightlife.

I reminded Tamie that since I was now 42 years old my inclination was definitely more towards relaxing dinners, a comfortable lounge atmosphere with some energy but much less the club scene. Tamie suggested that on my next trip out East that I check out Blue & Cream, a hip clothing store which has a significant celebrity clientele.

Towards the end of my evening, I ran into the sociable and dapper Cass Almendral. After we exchanged pleasantries, I took a look around, leaned over, and with deference told him that, "at the end of the day, I guess that it really is a Cassworld after all."

Creating, developing and maintaining a social life requires time, effort and planning, much in the same way as it does with any other aspect of your life from career, fitness and romance. Good things may happen incidentally if you are in the game so to speak but how and whom you decide to play with is very much your decision. Any life without a social component is a lesser life. It is my hope that many of you will find a rewarding social life of your own if you have not already.

Oh how I long for those Pre 9/11 summers past when I viewed and felt the world around me differently than I do now. Similar to the way a school kid feels at the commencement of another school year in September, while I am otherwise the optimist, I greet each summer with a bit of reservation, trepidation and angst; a little less care free than in prior years. My life journey has been more than I imagined in some ways and much less so in others.

My most memorable Hamptons memories are of:

-summer barbecues with my paisans while we drank endless bottles of full bodied Cabernet Sauvignon, Sauvignon Blanc and listening to Frank Sinatra

-lazy days at the beach after spinning, lifting weights at the East Hampton Gym, lotte berk classes or long runs after my morning coffee

-steak dinners at The Palm with former friend/girlfriend and publicist Andrea Werbel

-happy hours on the deck at B. Smiths in Sag Harbor

-making new friends at the Cowgirl Palace, home of Sally Morse

-Sunday evening tex mex and margarita's with Deborah Weiner, former owner of the Natural Beauty Spa.

Times have changed. I expect that new faces, new friends and hopefully new romance will alter the landscape but I do not suspect that my indelible memories of summers past in the Hamptons and the people I met, will ever fade.

The Legacy of Jack Welch: still feeding at the trough

Last Wednesday evening, April 6, 2005, while I was at the Dressed to Kilt event, some well connected friends as well as a who's who of New York Media & Society were at the The Four Seasons restaurant on East 52nd Street.  Rupert Murdoch hosted a book release party for former legendary GE CEO and best-selling author “Neutron Jack” Welch for his second best-seller entitled “Winning”  which was co-authored by his present wife Suzy Welch. Suzy is the former Harvard Business Review Editor known as Suzy Wetlaufer, who met Jack while she was covering him for a story on the Industry Titan and later became Jack's mistress while he was married to Jane Welch. The irony of those who already won feting a man for a book entitled "Winning" was not lost on me. It is not likely that any of them need to read this book.

         My hesitance to accept the canonization of Jack Welch has less to do with my allegiance to David Letterman even though I view Jack ultimately responsible for the  decision to replace Johnny Carson on Late Night with the less talented tukhis kisser Jay Leno. Mr. Welch was compensated as if he created or invented General Electric rather than as if he ran the company as its Chief Executive; an important distinction. Whether you are liberal or conservative, Democrat or Republican, before we digest and accept the legacy as being foisted on the public by the Corporate media, it is fair to ask whether this type of leader was actually good for America.  As a friend of mine said to me, "Chris, you really ought to read more before you jump on the bandwagon validating the legend of Jack Welch. If you do, you will likely find that for all of the moral pontification, and the publicity to establish his legacy, a more apropos title for his book is 'Stealing.' This man is one of the principal robber barrons of the last half century. He is nothing more than a symbol for capitalist greed and excess." Even I thought that was a little harsh but the point was made.

        Jack Welch was certainly a charismatic leader who was at the the helm of GE during the most profitable stretch in the company's history.  We do not, however, attribute complete and total success or failure to our politicians for everything that occurs on their watch, with say regard to the economy.  We always contemplate the proximate cause of their success or failure or whether or not there were intervening causes. Is it thus not fair to ask the same and whether the legacy being foisted upon the American public is an accurate one?  Is it unfair to question the motives of a man who has spent the better part of his adult life in control of one of the most affluent, far reaching and powerful global corporations which also happens to do significant work for our government, the defense industry and also controls a significant media concern? Further, when such an individual has exhibited gross dishonesty in his marital and professional life, used the media as an instrument to affect political outcomes and otherwise seeks to be canonized as one of the greatest, most successful and moral CEO's of our time, is it not fair to request an examination of the man outside the media spin cycle, at least before he is Knighted or we grant him Sainthood.  A billionaire CEO winding down his affairs in life and not pursuing any further employment, who has already published several books pontificating on his managment prowess is obviously not at this point in it for the money.

      The book "Winning" by Jack Welch with Suzy Welch, amounts to far less than a Tony Robbins inspirational guide. The people most interested in reading this book have already won. Winning is instead rather a self serving platform for for a meglomaniac to further embellish and restablish his legacy and celebrity. This book falls into the category of celebrity myth. It is myth building on a grand scale without a budget. It is no coincidence that Mr. Welch's negotiations with the Publisher had less to do with his book's advance which he graciously donated to charity but rather gaining the concession that the Publisher would spend millions promoting the book and the man. Ironically, perhaps the only jobs that we can give Mr. Welch full credit for creating are those of the Publishers of his books and the Publicists hired to mythify the man.

    If history is honest, despite the multimillion dollar publicity campaign being waged to edit recent history and otherwise cement his legacy, Jack Welch may be most remembered by his critics for ushering in the era of the Charismatic but Grossly Overcompensated Billion Dollar CEO while outsourcing a significant chunk of America's manufacturing base.   Arguably, without Jack Welch, you do not have Ken Lay, Dennis Kozlowski, Richard Grosso, and other executives of that ilk. Some of the obscene pay packages engineered by this lot had less to do with the results that could be attributed to their management and more to do with Ronald Regan's tax policies which resulted in the greatest bull market(s) in our history. Why we celebrate billionaires regardless of their principals, as we usher in an permanent professional underclass is beyond me. The world is not the same. If nothing else some of these people should be more critically analyzed rather than being given a free pass.  Why are we being subjected to this media onslaught extolling his virtues?  LEGACY. Plain and simple that is what this is about. If you buy the book perhaps you will buy the legacy but then again, maybe you won't do either. That is my recommendation.

SEE ALSO:

-At Any Cost: Jack Welch, General Electric and the Pursuit of Profit

-Forum: when the media are the massage

-Welch Says Perks Deserved but looked bad

-Overvalued: Why Jack Welch Isn't God

-Boardroom Bady Boys

-Good Charisma Bad Business

-The Jack Welch War Plan

-General Electric's Jack Welch & the corporate plundering of America

-The Media Cover-Up of The Gore Victory, Part Four, Democracy General Electric Style

Society's Gatekeepers

Christo & Jeanne-Claude's, "The Gates" may have left Central Park but make no mistake, the "gates" in terms of barriers to entry still remain. I was recently reminded in a not so subtle fashion of that fact. It is less important who these "gatekeepers" are than is the perception of their own self importance that allows them to fancy themselves as such.

(photo: Two people who are on everyone's list. Socialite Susan Shin with Richard Johnson (Editor of New York Post's Page 6), the only daily read, last week at the 3rd Annual Dressed to Kilt: A Scottish Evening of Fashion & Fun)

Most of us have grown accustomed to the List, the Velvet Rope, the VIP Section, the Co-op Board etc. They are all symbols of/or social constructs designed to exclude based upon elements of perceived status or lack thereof. In some cases, it is based upon wealth, power, pedigree, beauty, intelligence or artistic, professional or entrepreneurial accomplishment. The process of getting on the list, being considered for the list and attaining it is a sign for many that they have arrived or are connected, wired in etc. Potential exclusion is the attraction. Getting beyond it is obviously the goal for many. Exclusivity sells insofar that nobody really wants to go to anything that anyone can get into. To quote Groucho Marx, "I do not want to belong to any club that will have me as a member."

Gatekeepers are not inclusive. Instead they see the world outlined and narrowed to seem pre-conceived list and are intent on informing you that you do not belong, that in their eyes you are not "relevant" or are to be discounted. While some who find themselves on the other end of this treatment are often left to feel belittled in some way, others such as the notorious "Shaggy" have become infamous for crashing events that he was not otherwise invited to. Ironically, Society Gossip Columnist Ben Widdicombe has a column entitled "Gatecrasher" when he is anything but, and is always on the list.

If I sound bitter, I am actually not. More often than not I have been the fortunate recipient and beneficiary of extraordinary and unexpected acts of grace, kindness and consideration. It is, however, the sociological aspects that I find most amusing and intriquing. As I have grown older, wiser (hopefully) and more experienced in life, from my successes and my failures (of which there have been many) my self esteem became much less tied to any one aspect of my life, whether it is my appearance, career, the attention of women, or men for that matter, fellow employees, an employer or even journalists (including bloggers). Instead my self-esteem is derived from a complex conglomeration of factors.

Historical notions of what constitutes "Society" may have loosened up somewhat with the commercialization and selling of status, including a reality culture that has given seemingly anyone and everyone their 15 Minutes of fame. The proliferation of luxury lifestyle publications, society columns and self-anointed photographers who's business it is to corner the market on who and what appear in major media publications, each have their own take on what and who constitute "Society." There is always some guardian of the social order who is either assigned to determine or takes it  upon him or herself to decide the proper element and whether in fact you qualify for consideration. Some are more gracious and respectful than others in how and why they create limitations for admission to the social hierarchy.

Who decides and why? What publications constitute making Society's "A" List? Is it  being mentioned or otherwise appearing in the pages of Avenue, Quest, Town & Country, Vanity Fair, The New York Observer, Absolute, Gotham or Hamptons Magazine or the pages of David Patrick Columbia's New York Social Diary? Or does being notorious and frequently mentioned on Richard Johnson's Page 6, Gawker or Rush & Malloy qualify? Is it just being noticed or noticed for something in particular? Is it once or do you need to appear more regularly and pull a hat trick of sorts and be mentioned in several publications? Is it the result of philanthropy or other charitable deeds, beauty, wealth, power or artistic talent? Is it who you sleep with or in the case of Candace Bushnell who you write about sleeping with? Do you need a Publicist or sponsor? If you need a Publicist, no doubt it has to be R Couri Hay. Even more fascinating, however, is why people who are excluded or marginalized in some way seek the approval of those that exclude them merely for the opportunity to be seen and photographed. Or perhaps it is so that they become Google-able-- so that their name and photo come up high in google search engines as a patron of the arts and charity. Being seen is important, being photographed and mentioned well now that is the ultimate goal. But why??

These are the thoughts that were swimming in my head last Wednesday evening April 6th as I head to the Copacabana for the 3rd Annual Dressed to Kilt, a Scottish Evening of Fashion Fun while uptown several other events were going on, most notably at The Carlyle (Black Tie Dinner Benefit for the Versailles Foundation, Inc./Claude Monet-Governy in the presence of Her Majesty Queen Noor of Jordan) and the Four Seasons.

Manhattan Has Gone to the Dogs

 

Above:  Gregg R. Oehler, Publisher of The New York Dog Magazine, VIP Guest and her dog and R Couri Hay. Click here to see more photos. 

________________

I want a dog, a Chihuahua
When I get back to my small flat
I want to hear somebody bark
Oh, you can get lonely
I want a dog

Don't want a cat
scratching its claws all over my habitat
giving no love and getting fat
Oh, you can get lonely
and a cat's no help with that………

-The Pet Shop Boys

On Monday night I head downtown to the Spike Gallery in Chelsea (547 West 20th Street at the edge of west side highway) for the Scouts Black Tie *For Dogs* Spring Art Gala to benefit Animal Haven Shelter and the Mayor's Alliance for NYC Animals. The evening was sponsored by Scout (Dog Boutique and Pawtiserie), The New York Dog Magazine and Spike Gallery.  The door to the gallery was open to a green (grass colored) carpet for the dogs at the end of which was a camera crew and journalist from Animal Planet greeting and interviewing the dog owners. The gallery was tastefully adorned with paintings of dogs. 

It was a spectacle not to be believed. One by one New York Socialite women and their dogs entered the gallery with their pets nearly as well styled, and in some cases even more so than their owners. I noticed a table with delectable looking pastries and cupcakes. I was about to dig in when I was advised that they were “doggie treats” and not for people. The cupcakes were miniature replicas of my favorites from Billy’s Bakery. I was envious of those little pooches. It was clear that this was their Gala and I was merely a spectator.

In plain view at the bar, however, was the friendly orange label with those magical French words, Veuve Clicquot,which if you do not know, means excellent champagne. I am always in the mood for The Bubbly. Better yet the "VC" was being served by a buff blonde girl with arms and a stomach that would shame Linda Hamilton in Terminator 2: Judgment Day. Her face was not exactly difficult to look at either. I said something about wanting to get some photos of her pouring the sponsored champagne from Veuve Clicquot. She had no issues with that and thus gave me license to gawk at her with my Canon G6 Camera and drink another glass of champagne. Anywhere else she might have been considered one of the most beautiful creatures in the room. But here nearly everyone was preoccupied with the dogs. Lest they not know that I was also a dog, albeit one on two legs prowling the room for something a tad different.

I was bewildered by the abundance of major media covering this event. Every where I turned there was a Canon or Nikon SLR in my face. I intended to make it an early evening having actually brought my gym bag to go to CLAYon 14^th Street. But, then it happened. The women, extremely attractive, well mannered and stylish started to pack the gallery, first Christine Cachot Williams, then Mona Wyatt. The parade did not end, so I finished my glass of champagne and did what I normally do, which is take pictures of beautiful people, in this case, with their dogs.  Also in attendance were my friends (Roger Webster, Linda Mansfield, Shawna Enright & R Couri Hay ) from the Office of R Couri Hay, Creative Public Relations, the remier society publicity firm. Linda Mansfield personally introduced me to Gregg R. Oehler, Publisher of The New York Dog Magazine which is in essence the Gotham Magazine of the Doggie Industry. Before leaving I made the acquaintance of many in the Pet Industry. Most notably Kathy Santo, dog behaviorist and author of “Dog Sense”; Heather & Peter Caraballo of The Pink Hotdog.com;and Julia Szabo, Pet Columnist and Author and dog trainer Rikke Brogaard, who recommended that I check out a worthwhile organization that she is affiliated with, the Mid-Atlantic Great Dane Rescue League. Also networking and mixing in the crowd were the ladies from Leashes and Lovers a singles networking group for dog lovers, who were passing out flyers to their events.

On some level, I was blindsided by the emergence of this urban dog culture. While this constituency, and it is one when politicians and luxury marketers begin taking notice, developed I was clueless and late to comprehend the growing obsession with Dogs in Manhattan in particular. At the end of last year, I attended a benefit for the ASPCA at JCREW and have even had the chance to visit the Woof Spa in Chelsea on several occassions to pick up a pooch for a friend.

I am reminded of the Pet Shop Boys anthem “I want a Dog”, a simple song that symbolizes life in urban society; single, married without children or divorced and returning to an empty home. This is not something that many of us generally look forward to. There are times when I return home wondering what it would be like to be greeted by "Dukie" (my childhood family dog, so much a member of the family that he dined simulataneously with us and we often fed him healthy people food. This was in the 1970’s before the proliferation of services and businesses catering to the pampered pet). We just loved him. He slept in my bed and when he passed away while I was in my first year at college I was depressed for a week. To this day, I still miss him. Not a week goes by, especially now that I do not think of him.

So, when Sara Schaffer of www.dogsarepeopletoo.com asked me to snap a photo of her with “her babies”, how could I say no? They are her family and whom she chooses to pamper. Maybe I should have advised the bartender that men are dogs too, although not necessarily as well pampered. I could learn a thing or two from one of those dogs. Life might be better with four legs and a tail, at least in some households in Manhattan. Just an observation but perhaps it is not too far fetched to suggest that the growing Dog Industry has sprouted to cater to an affluent clientele of lonely New Yorkers (urban dwellers) who have reached the nesting age and replaced animals with the children that they no longer seem to be having for one reason or another. The reasons? Well that is a subject for another day.

Addicted to...."Pieces of Ass"

What is playing at Dodger Stages these days is is a brand of "creative, hip, edgy, entrepreneurial downtown" type theater reminiscent of the glory of New York's theatrical past, with a modern twist........in the convenience of midtown west. Symbolic of this renaissance of sorts is "Pieces of Ass", a New Scenario Entertainment Production.

The phrase "Pieces of Ass" conjures up an image of a drunken frat boy, redneck or  misogynist Male's lustful matter of reference to women.  Admittedly while that phraseology has never been part of my vocabulary, the image of someone deserving of that title is nevertheless quite vivid. On that level alone, the show does not disappoint. The title is as jarring or offensive as it is descriptive of the pure quality of femininity that plays on the stage several nights per week, from the regular cast members to the Center Pieces which have graced the stage in the last few months, including Anna Benson, Catherine Hickland, Supermodel's Carol Alt & Janice Dickinson to reality stars Jennifer Crisafulli, Trishelle Canatella, Kirsten Buschbacher and so on. The women are all exceptionally beautiful and compelling in uniquely different ways.

This past Sunday I had the opportunity to see the 100th performance of Pieces of Ass at Dodger Stages. For a variety of reasons, I had been reticent to see the show until a couple of months ago when I received the invitation from publicist in the know, Norah Lawlor of the Lawlor Media Group. Norah is like E.F. Hutton; when she calls, people listen. Never does she overshadow or steal the limelight from clients. Norah and her protege Katie Murphy spend most of their time methodically connecting the dots in New York City, making sure that their clients get the proper exposure.The hook was that the upcoming show was a Benefit Performance & Fundraiser for Victims of the Tsunami Disaster hosted by Anna Benson, wife and agent of Kris Benson, New York Mets pitcher. The show was to be followed by a cast party at The Darklight represented by charming nightlife publicist Tamie Peters.

By the time I had gone to see the show for the first time, it had been critiqued by most of the real writers in the major print publications. I had preconceived notions about the show and wondered what I would get out of watching really hot women kvetching about the relative challenges that they have faced as a result of the gifts that mother nature has bestowed on them. It turned out that I could not be any more wrong.

The show had opened in the wake of the popularity of Sex and the City and the female empowerment movement.  Needless to say, I was not impressed with the symbols of female empowerment in Manhattan social life. From Manhattan to the Hampton's I witnessed the growth of a vapid female class of frat boys who, in the name of girl power, adopted all of the horrible traits of their fraternity type male counterparts rather than the lessons of true independence, individual responsibility, camaraderie and support. Sex and the City may have been a show with contrary intentions but it came to represent vapid ideals such as "the BBD" (the bigger better deal syndrome) combined with consumerist excess. It was an infomercial for everything that was repulsive in our urban culture.

Perhaps I had a chip on my shoulder or lingering resentment and hostility from being dumped by an avowed princess with a self entitlement complex. The last thing that I was receptive to was a show about the crisis faced by beautiful and intelligent women in this town. I was a 40 something male who felt the jibe in Bruce Springsteen's song "Glory Days" and wondered too if my best days were behind me.  If so, why did I waste all those prime years dating  one Manhattan Princess after another with problems so complicated as which physician was the most liberal dispensing prescription drugs (anti-depressants and sleeping pills) while they sucked down Cosmo's and contemplated such difficult choices as (a) Gucci vs. Prada, (b) who pays for the Manolo's, (i) her account, (ii) daddy's Amex or (iii) the schmo/boyfriend, i.e., me. The last one, a ruthless publicist (joke!) broke my heart. So much so that it changed me and defeated me as much as I tried to not let it do so. In fact, around that time a female friend observed, "Chris, you have gone from a buff yuppie attorney with the body of Sylvester Stallone to an angry middle aged man, like Larry David." She was right. Accordingly, I was really in no mood for "women on the verge" on Broadway or off Broadway.

With my expectations low, my escort having canceled and sensing that there were far worse things to do than to watch and listen to beautiful women on stage and afterward take a few photos I head to Dodger Stages. I was a little self conscious. A writer I am not....a photographer? Patrick McMullan is not exactly quivering in his boots. I am more like the accidental tourist on the Manhattan social scene. All the doors opened once I genuinely did not care whether I was accepted for who I was or not. I am always invited but never question why, never crash and do not engage in paparazzi style photography as I am not looking to humiliate or expose anyone. Ivy League education and former Wall Street legal career not with standing, I have never forgotten where I come from, the boroughs of Brooklyn and Queens. I am bridge and tunnel. My mom was born in Chelsea so Manhattan is really her town.  When she remarried, we got poached to the Island of Manhattan, leaving the D Train and 7 Train behind.

I look at everything through the lens of the one who is dying  to get in but cannot, not because he is awed by who or what is inside but more out of a genuine curiosity to see and understand, much like I was as a child sitting in the living room pretending to play with my toys while eavesdropping on adult conversations. I can't help it. On some level I am socially addicted.

The success of "Pieces of Ass" lays in the zone of free expression that Brian Howie, Thomas Hanna and the folks at  New Scenario Entertainment have so adeptly crafted without otherwise undermining the story telling by a talented and evolved cast of women who share their real life experiences in a manner that is both earnest and entertaining. Many of these women, I hope to be seeing on the stage and screen in the coming years.

Pieces of Ass succeeds specifically, however, because it is smart, sassy and well styled but more so because it will make you fall in love with women all over again. You will see women in a new light. Your confidence restored in the value of womanhood as a whole. It rekindles the spirit and helps men (and women) understand, at least partially, the wonder and complexity of femininity. If you are like me, you walk away wondering whether perhaps at some point you in your life you have underestimated or misjudged an exceptional woman or two, if not more. Pieces of Ass is a modern tapestry of the cultural phenomenon which is the 21st century woman. To see a collection of photos from several shows and cast parties that I have taken,click here

New York City Center Access Group, Friends & Fete Event

Catherine Gordon, friend and New York City Center Access Group Member emailed and then called me to ask, "Chris, are you coming Tuesday night to our Friends & Fete Event at Cafe Spice?" Catherine's personal invitation was followed by a passionate dissertation on the history of NY City Center, as the oldest New York City Center for the Performing Arts, the importance of arts programming for urban youth and why she has devoted herself, her energy and network of friends to support growth of the Access Group, City Center's Young Professionals Group.

I was informed that it would be a brief mixer, between 6-8 pm, centrally located on 55th Street, near the corner of 6th Avenue with Indian food and beverages to support City Center's Adopt a School Program. The Program provides arts programming for students at the Access-sponsored Beacon High School. This season Beacon High School kicked off their participation with City Center's Young People Dance Series by sending 100 excited students to an Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater performance. Students will again visit NY City Center this April to see Martha Graham Dance Company.

I equivocated initially since work, exercise and event coverage had left me over tired. I was actually hoping to have nothing to do of a social nature this week..no dates, no friends, no drinks. As I hung up the phone Catherine's energy and enthusiasm reverberated in my ears.  I realized that this was more than a simple cocktail party. So, this past Tuesday night I head to Cafe Spice with my gym bag in tow figuring that I would greet some friends that I had not seen in a while, take a few photos, support a great cause and otherwise limit myself to one (yeah right!) glass of wine, Sauvignon Blanc. This was to be followed by an evening of weights and cardio at Clay.

By 7 pm, while the rest of 55th street was relatively quiet, Cafe Spice was buzzing, filled with an eclectic array of professionals, a good mix of male and female attendees I might add, jamming the bar and indulging in the spicy Indian fare. Three glasses of wine later, all I could think about was laying down on my bed and not any kind of a bench in a gym. My summer exercise program suffered a setback yet another night. 

At approximately 8:30 pm, I left Cafe Spice with the bar was still jamming. I head down 55th street towards 5th Avenue, snapped a few more photos, and noticed that The Pump Energy Food Restaurant was still open. I ordered my usual #48 Thunder Plate, grabbed a cab and head home to Yorkville on the Upper East Side. Never so happy was I to return home to an empty bed. Just a few years ago that itself would have made for a unique night. How ironic that I used to evaluate my relative success by how often someone was there waiting in my bed. Yet now it is the sound of silence that relaxes me even more than sex. To see photos from the evening, click here to go to the ofoto album